Friday, January 30, 2015

I'm Hot!!! (or maybe not)


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In earlier posts I mentioned that I'm often the target of "women" with seemingly bogus profiles. The above two pictures are the actual pictures of the last two "28-year-olds" who favorited me. Funny thing, the day after we favorited each other, their profiles disappeared. Anyway, I thought you'd enjoy this real email I got from another "hot chick."

Wednesday, January 28, 2015

The Short Goodbye





The Short Goodbye

By now readers will be fairly acquainted with Hockey Mom, the youngest of the Sarandon sisters. I still like Hockey Mom despite the curious circumstances under which the relationship terminated.

Monday, January 26, 2015

Bogus Profiles with a Twist


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Bogus Profiles with a Twist

In a recent post, I wrote about a strange phenomenon in which what appear to be 28-year-old females become smitten with Lex but under circumstances that led me to believe they were neither 28 nor female.  Today I would like to tell a related story, a variation on the theme, if you will. 

Saturday, January 24, 2015

Quieting the Inner Voice






Quieting the Inner Voice

For most of my life I assumed that the voice in my head and me were the same thing. Until you notice the voice, and don’t even necessarily agree with the voice, then you have a weird brain-zapping aha-moment where you are aware of your awareness and you suddenly spy a glimpse of your ego. I like the term author Michael Singer uses for the voice – your roommate. So I have been listening to my roommate more carefully lately, especially now that I understand that I’m not her, I only have to live with her. And let me tell you, she is totally annoying.

She does not shut up with her endless chatter and observations, which is very distracting when I’m trying to relax, enjoy myself, work, run, hike, walk my dog, read, or focus on something. When I have insomnia, she is thrilled because apparently she does not sleep and loves having someone to talk at in the wee hours. I notice that when I’m really trying to listen to someone I care about she is like a petulant, interrupting child poking me and interjecting irrelevant thoughts or else obsessed with ideas of what I could say next.

Seriously, if she were renting a room in my house instead of space in my head – I would promptly evict this pain in the ass.


Sometimes the things we love in life merge and become one. Chris Martin from Coldplay recently fronted for u2 when Bono was recovering from a bicycle accident. This week Kristin Armstrong, a runner who serves as my de factor spiritual guide, wrote a column about self-compassion and quieting the inner voice that often disrupts our daily existence by interjecting unwelcome, critical thoughts into our brains, a subject addressed by another favorite author, KellyMcGonigal, a Stanford professor who has written about neuroscience and Eastern Wisdom.

Wednesday, January 21, 2015

A Light Over Yonder





A Light Over Yonder

When the Ex told me things were over and she had no intention of going to see a counselor to try and make things work, I had two goals. 1) To get the hell out; and 2) do this as quickly as possible. Not just get out of the house, but get out of the marriage.

Monday, January 19, 2015

Bogus Profiles





Bogus Profiles

My Ex is 8 years younger than me and bears more than a faint resemblance to Meg Ryan . . . in her prime. So it was neither a surprise nor cause for concern when even younger women began striking up conversations with me shortly after I joined Match.  It did become a concern later once I noticed a suspicious pattern.

Friday, January 16, 2015

I'm Sorry (v.2)



There is a school of thought that believes when a relationship fails, it's almost never about you. It's about the other guy. This always seemed like self-serving psycho-babble to me. How could the failure of a relationship between two people be about anything other than, well, you know, both people?

After this week, I might be warming up to the notion.

Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Dating Does have its Advantages . . .



I haven't even been divorced one year, and a day doesn't go by where I don't think to myself I ain't ever doin' that again (getting married).

Example:

Monday, January 12, 2015

U-G-H





U-G-H

Another relationship bit the dust over the weekend. Seems we weren’t “at the same place” in our lives. This is code for “you have young kids and I don’t.” That’s OK, though, and I’ll tell you why.
I remember one of the first women who contacted me on Match was exactly the same age, super cute (she looked just like Suzy Kolber), and had a travel job like me. Even before we met, it turned out we were traveling to the same state during the same week, and had made plans to have a cup of coffee there.

Saturday, January 10, 2015

Online Dating – Making Sense of It




Online Dating – Making Sense of It

Ahhh, online dating. If you are new to this, welcome. If you are not, well, then, you’ll likely find what I write here interesting and perhaps even entertaining.

Thursday, January 8, 2015

The Relationship Guru





The Relationship Guru

The number of people without profile pics on these dating sites is surprisingly high. When I first joined Match, I would delete without reading any messages I received from persons without profile pics. Then one day I received a message on POF from a woman with no profile pic, and for some reason I opened and replied.

Monday, January 5, 2015

The Invisible Hand


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I mentioned earlier that I made it through much of my life without realizing I had a thing for Susan Sarandon. I made this discovery recently when I noticed that I was communicating with three women all of whom could be mistaken for Sarandon cousins.